StellarWind Elsydeon (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
stellarwind) wrote2004-08-14 11:10 am
stellarwind) wrote2004-08-14 11:10 am
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Puff the Magic Dragon... Signed a Lifetime Contract with Nintendo. ;P
... Yoshi is one flicked up organism.
Let's see.. he's a reptile. That's the only thing about him that's certain. What sort of reptile exactly is still a matter of speculation as he seems a cross of a dinosaur, a gecko and a chameleon with a natural saddle on his back and natural SHOES on his feet. His kindred hatches, at full maturity, from eggs, WITH said saddle and shoes, and small back-plates which can't possibly be used for body temperature regulation - and his battle strategy involves *eating* his opponents, chameleon style, and spitting their remains at his other opponents (a very unsportsmanlike way of battling, if you ask me). And what's with his occasional fire breathing?
... Must be indigestion. xD
Which led me to the following theory.
1) The mature forms we see hatching from eggs really are baby forms.
2) It's not a saddle, it's a shell. Like on Lapras, you know?
3) Those shoes are still plain flicked up, but they could be accounted for as a layer of bone and leather which it grows on its feet with age to allow it better protection of its legs.
4) Certain fruit, while digested, may produce a gas which ignites in exposure to air, which are stored in the Yoshi's cheek pouches to the point they build up to the point where Yoshi has to release them. Pernese Dragon Ripoff yes, but works.
It also led me to the following conclusions.
1) Yoshies are genetically engineered.
2) I don't want to see the mother who's been laying all those Yoshi eggs.
3) Yoshi would make a mean football/soccer (whatever you call it wherever you are) player. x_X
4) Nintendo has been obviously getting high on those mushrooms that make Mario grow twice his natural size.
5) I put waaaaaaaaaay too much thought into imaginary creatures.
But then again, this takes place in a reality where mushrooms are animated, throwing turnips at your enemies is enough to slay them efficiently, eating magical leaves causes you to sprout a flight-enabled fursuit, eating flowers makes you breathe fire, fat plumbers are superheroes, blocks naturally have eyes, and the resident princess has a knack for being kidnapped by a spiky, overgrown turtle lizard with a flaming orange DBZ-esque mane.
Out of the above, did anything make sense to you? If so, seek help. Or seek work at Nintendo.
Let's see.. he's a reptile. That's the only thing about him that's certain. What sort of reptile exactly is still a matter of speculation as he seems a cross of a dinosaur, a gecko and a chameleon with a natural saddle on his back and natural SHOES on his feet. His kindred hatches, at full maturity, from eggs, WITH said saddle and shoes, and small back-plates which can't possibly be used for body temperature regulation - and his battle strategy involves *eating* his opponents, chameleon style, and spitting their remains at his other opponents (a very unsportsmanlike way of battling, if you ask me). And what's with his occasional fire breathing?
... Must be indigestion. xD
Which led me to the following theory.
1) The mature forms we see hatching from eggs really are baby forms.
2) It's not a saddle, it's a shell. Like on Lapras, you know?
3) Those shoes are still plain flicked up, but they could be accounted for as a layer of bone and leather which it grows on its feet with age to allow it better protection of its legs.
4) Certain fruit, while digested, may produce a gas which ignites in exposure to air, which are stored in the Yoshi's cheek pouches to the point they build up to the point where Yoshi has to release them. Pernese Dragon Ripoff yes, but works.
It also led me to the following conclusions.
1) Yoshies are genetically engineered.
2) I don't want to see the mother who's been laying all those Yoshi eggs.
3) Yoshi would make a mean football/soccer (whatever you call it wherever you are) player. x_X
4) Nintendo has been obviously getting high on those mushrooms that make Mario grow twice his natural size.
5) I put waaaaaaaaaay too much thought into imaginary creatures.
But then again, this takes place in a reality where mushrooms are animated, throwing turnips at your enemies is enough to slay them efficiently, eating magical leaves causes you to sprout a flight-enabled fursuit, eating flowers makes you breathe fire, fat plumbers are superheroes, blocks naturally have eyes, and the resident princess has a knack for being kidnapped by a spiky, overgrown turtle lizard with a flaming orange DBZ-esque mane.
Out of the above, did anything make sense to you? If so, seek help. Or seek work at Nintendo.
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Also, don't forget that even the baby Yoshis seem able to lay their own eggs instantaneously... (THAT'll take a bit of explaining) Which seems to suggest the "genetically engineered" bit, and would also help explain what a nuclear power plant is doing in Nintendo World anyway.
I'm afraid I can't seek work at Nintendo. That leaves professional help, and since my profession is librarian-page-ship that means sitting in the shade and reading. *g*
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Maybe they're related to Tribbles? =O
~Talec
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