So, who SHOULD Digimon Characters apologize to?

As posted by me and translated on the Israeli Digimon Forum:

* Tai/Taichi should apologize to generations upon generations of Digimon main characters, who need to run around with goggles on their head because of him.
* Matt/Yamato should apologize to all Taito/Taiora fans.
* Sora should apologize to her fashion sense for that atrocious bucket she wore for a hat through the entire first season.
* Mimi should apologize to Barbie because her Digimon is not pink until it hits its ultimate level (And Palmon should, accordingly, kick her upside the head.)
* Joe should apologize to the World Hypochondriac Association for betraying them and becoming a doctor.
* Izzy/Koushiro should apologize to his laptop for neglecting it through all of 02.
* T.K./Takeru should apologize to anyone who didn't like the way 02 ended - he was the narrator of the entire story, after all.
* Kari/Hikari should apologize to all those who watched Digimon for being the biggest Mary-Sue in the history of Digimon until Tohma came along!

* Davis/Daisuke should force his dubbers to apologize for making him a pain in humanity's ass.
* Yolei/Miyako should apologize to Lucca from Chrono Trigger for being a complete ripoff of hers.
* Cody/Iori doesn't need to apologize to anyone, as he hasn't done anything wrong. He hasn't done anything USEFUL either, but what the hell ever.
* Ken... should apologize to half the universe and its wife. Let's leave the poor guy alone, though, he had a whole flashback episode and half a season to atone for his sins.

* Takato has already apologized to whoever he needs to apologize, let's leave him alone too.
* Rika/Ruki should apologize to the audience for being a total bitch until episode... like... 12? <<
* Henry/Jenrya should apologize to Willis (of the Golden Digimentals movie) for not only stealing his starter Digimon, but for being able to evolve said starter into a Rapidmon without a Digimental.
* Jeri/Juri should apologize to the entire world - if she hadn't turned into an annoying depressed suicidal emo-kid, the D-Reaper wouldn't have come into the real world.
* Hirokazu and Kenta should apologize to my head for the headache they gave me with that godawful bath song of theirs. WHO THE HELL LET THOSE TWO CRAZIES SING?! XD
* Ryo should apologize to all Digimon fans who know something about the fact that he's a walking, breathing plot hole.
* Suzie/Shuichon should apologize to the world's rabbit population for the sheer animal abuse she puts both Terriermon and Lopmon through.
* Yamaki should apologize to H.P. Lovecraft (for totally plagiarizing his program names from his works), his Zippo lighter (poor thing has probably had a concussion already) and to all Men in Black wherever they are.

* Takuya should apologize to... Oh screw it, the dub should apologize to Takuya for mispronouncing his name through the entire season!
* Koji should apologize to George Lucas. He did steal a pair of lightsabers for his silly Wolfmon costume...
* Zoe/Izumi should apologize to all female Digimon fans for being the most totally ineffectual and useless character the series has ever spawned.
* J.P./Junpei should apologize to the stereotype that all Chosen Children are always thin, with huge heads and hands for painfully breaking it.
* Tomoki should apologize to 01-age TK/Takeru for shamelessly stealing the title of "Most Annoying Digimon Child Character Ever" from him.
* Koichi should apologize to the staff of the Shibuya train station. He really DID make quite a mess by not looking where he's running, crashing down the stairs and being smacked unconscious. Also, he should apologize to Shibumi for stealing his idea of being in the Digital World while being in a coma in the real world, but that's a different story.

* Masaru should apologize to his fists. Because all gods know he put them through a shit-load of abuse.
* Tohma should apologize to all Digimon viewers for being even a bigger Mary-Sue than HIKARI! O_o
* Yoshino should apologize to anyone else who waited for another kickass female character like Rika/Ruki was - as she was intolerably pessimistic with a penchant for pointing out the obvious and just about the same level of usefulness as Zoe/Izumi...
* Ikuto should apologize to Hayao Miyazaki - as obviously, with all due respect, the kid is a total Princess Mononoke fanboy.
* Setsuma should apologize to the Digimon Savers artist - It must have been SO hard for them to draw a male who wasn't a bishie...
* Miki and Megumi should apologize to all those of us who thought that Digimon would spare us the one-dimensional female characters with miniskirts.
* Hiroshi Yushima should apologize to many other characters who share his cliché.

This covers the human characters. Tune in next time when I do the Digimon. XD

And who should the DIGIMON apologize to?

* Agumon (Adventure) should apologize to the next generations of main-character Digimon for setting the stereotype that they all should be fire-type and at least halfway dinosaur or dragon.
* Gabumon should apologize to all protesters against fur coats.
* Biyomon should apologize, on behalf of the entire Digimon cast who wasn't fortunate enough to be related to Taichi, Yamato or any of their relatives, for the fact they never got to evolve beyond perfect/ultimate. Where the hell are Phoenixmon, HerculesKabuterimon, Vikemon and Rosemon, damnit?! (No, the Savers Rosemon doesn't count.)
* Palmon should apologize to me personally for having such a horrendous evolutionary line. I DEMAND A PLANT DIGIMON THAT LOOKS GOOD THROUGH -ALL- OF ITS STAGES, DAMNIT. ;-;
* Gomamon should apologize to the fish he slave-drives as part of his attack.
* Tentomon should apologize to H.R. Giger. Because, for frell's sake. Kabuterimon looks like a Xenomorph. >>
* Patamon should apologize to the laws of Aerodynamics - he should NOT be able to fly, ESPECIALLY with these... ears.
* Gatomon/Tailmon should apologize to Sailor Moon. Her evolution to Angewomon goes just a bit TOO well with the Sailor Moon Transformation sequence music.

* Veemon should apologize to Azulongmon/Qinglongmon for borrowing his spare horn for his Raidramon/Lighdramon armor and forgetting to return it.
* Hawkmon should apologize to native americans for the stereotypical indian feather stuck in his head.
* Armadillomon/Armadimon should apologize to Angemon - if he didn't have to fuse with him to get to his final form, he wouldn't look like a frelling robotic teapot (HOW the HELL does Dinosaur + Angel = Teapot?!)
* Wormmon should apologize to the Kamen Rider franchise for Stingmon's existence.

* Guilmon should apologize to a lot of Virus-types for being on the good guys' side for a change.
* Renamon doesn't owe anyone an apology. However, half the furry community owes her a fucking huge apology, for obvious reasons. X_X
* Terriermon should apologize to Keitai Denjuu Telefang for excessive use of gunarms, and also to the entire Mecha Anime style. (MegaGargomon/SaintGalgomon anyone?)
* Calumon should apologize to people who think small creatures with huge eyes and high-pitched voices who prance around acting like hyperactive three year olds are annoying.
* Impmon should apologize to all pyromaniacs in Japan who hoped that maybe he WILL burn the city after all.
* Leomon should apologize to all those who DON'T know that all Leomons keep dying and will continue dying, apparantly, forever.
* Guardromon should apologize to the industrial stove he used to be before turning into a robot.
* Cyberdramon should apologize to his therapist, for the severe amount of physical abuse that he must have put him through every time he had the nerve to suggest that Cyberdramon might be having a split personality...
* Lopmon should apologize to his dubbers for the trouble he caused them (not only they thought he was female, they also had to figure out what to do with the episode Suzie/Shuichon tried to teach him how to talk properly >>)
* MarineAngemon should apologize to all Mega Digimon for looking and acting like an In-Training. >>

* Agumon (Savers) should apologize to Agumon (Adventure) because DAMNIT, those holes-for-nostrils...
* Gaomon should apologize to anyone who thought the rest of his evolutionary line would look awesome. Also to anyone who is getting tired of his incessant 'Yes, Master!'-ing.
* Lalamon should apologize to Ken Sugimori because Sunflowmon is a total ripoff of Sunflora, to Lillymon for stealing her Mega form and the gimmick of evolving into an annoying pink faerie out of a totally unrelated freaky plant, and also to the dubbers who are going to have to edit just about any scene she appears in because she can't keep her clothes on for more than five minutes (Sailor-Moon style attacks and transformation sequence... HALP... X_X). Oh yeah. And to Zoe/Izumi too, for being just about as useful as she was.
* Falcomon should apologize to the original Falcomon and its evolutionary line because Diatrymon>Peckmon, and DEFINITELY Valdurmon>Ravemon. >>
* Kudamon should apologize to anyone who has doubts regarding his sexual identity - it's not his fault he has a woman's voice!
* the two Chessmon should apologize for never hitting their Mega stage and being generally ineffectual.
* Lastly, Kamemon should apologize to the aesthetic sense of all of us for his Adult/Champion form. MY EYES. THE GOGGLES DO NOTHING. x_x

(no subject)

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